Mate Switching Hypothesis

Mate Switching Hypothesis

by | May 5, 2020 | Dating & Mating Economy

Revisiting Female Short-term Mating Strategy & Infidelity

Why do women cheat on their partners?

A long-standing hypothesis in evolutionary psychology asserted that women seek extra-pair copulations (infidelity) in order to secure resources from another man or acquire good genes from him for potential offspring.

But do women really seek better genes from another man?  That part of the female “short-term mating strategy” has come into question.

New Statistics for Non-paternity

New data from DNA fingerprinting technology suggests only 2-3% of children come from men other than the husband or primary partner.  It appears women get genes and investment from exactly the same guy — their primary partner.

While the female short-term mating strategy may still feature acquisition of additional resources, there are other clues to explain the infidelity of women as reported by evolutionary psychologist David Buss.

Buss cites these clues:
  1. Women who are sexually or emotionally unhappy have affairs.
    This is not true for men. Men do not often report marital unhappiness as a reason for an affair. According to Buss, men can be relatively happy in their marriage and still have affairs. There is no difference in marital or sexual happiness between men who have affairs and men who do not. The issue of emotional dissatisfaction appears to be specific to women.
  2. 70% of women become emotionally involved with or fall in love with their affair partner.
    In contrast, only about 30% of men do.
  3. The qualities desired by women in an affair partner are identical, or nearly identical, to qualities desired in a long-term mate.
    This is not true for men. For example, women usually want intelligence in an affair partner. For men, intelligence in an affair partner is mostly irrelevant.

Desiring the same qualities in an affair partner further supports the view that the female long-term mating strategy is significantly more adaptive in evolution than the short-term mating strategy.  (See background notes below.)

So, what may be driving a woman to have an affair?

New research posits a different matrix of motivations, called the “mate switching hypothesis.”  Women have affairs, in part, to switch mates.

Preparing for “the Switch” — Partner Insurance

David Buss and Cindy Meston report (Why Women Have Sex) that women have affairs to test the waters to see if there is someone better out there for them, to attempt to “trade-up” for a better partner.  Women have affairs if they think their relationship may be dissolving.  And women cultivate “back-up mates.”  As Buss likes to joke in quoting a female research participant, “men are like soup; you always want to have some on the back burner.”  (See page: Why Women Have Sex.)

Nicole Wedberg’s research on heterosexual women while at SUNY New Paltz called this “partner insurance” – the cultivation of a back-up boyfriend, or “Mr. Plan B.”  Wedberg found that 20% of women in committed relationships will report having a Mr. Plan B.  One of the predictors included low relationship satisfaction.  Wedberg builds on the work of Dibble et al (2015) that found college women have on average 3.78 Plan Bs.*

Returning to Clue #1

Women unhappy in their current relationship may cheat in order to feel alive and expand their sense of self, says Esther Perel in State of Affairs.   Affairs are seen as acts of rebellion or bursts of freedom that release constraints. In Perel’s words, an emotionally dissatisfied woman “is not looking for another person as much as looking for another self.”  Yet, another person who demonstrates a desire for a woman is a powerful new elixir for self-esteem.  Affairs magnify the difference between being loved and being wanted.

Even in a search for a “new self,” the motivation to switch mates is easily triggered if there is sexual and emotional unhappiness.  Female choice in mate selection is the most powerful force on the planet.  What on the stove?  Partner insurance.  Tasty and willing Mr. Plan B.  Soups on.  Make the switch?

Post-script and Background Notes

The predominant theory in evolutionary psychology suggests humans have both long-term and short-term mating strategies that operate as concurrent functions sensitive to context and environmental conditions.

Women’s long-term mating strategy is a more predominant evolutionary adaptation than is their short-term strategy; it is driven by genetic characteristics and interests of our species: internal fertilization, an extended period of gestation, prolonged infant dependence on mother’s milk, and the need for relatively “high” male parental investment (compared to other primates).   A woman’s long-term strategy seeks protection and a provision of resources from a mate.  It also seeks character traits that ensure stability and loyalty to her and her children over the long-term.

As an evolutionary adaptation, men’s short-term mating strategy seeks more immediate sexual access to a variety of partners.  This view has not changed among evolutionary psychologists.  Research clearly supports the view that men seek more sexual partners than women.

Tension Between Preference for Resources and Character

This blog post reconsiders and updates the “dual hypothesis” for the female short-term mating strategy: seeking resources and/or genes from a partner other than the primary partner.

But what is more salient in mate selection and relationship satisfaction is the tension between two preferences INSIDE the female long-term strategy:  resources and character.   Resources and character are often dueling, competing preferences that necessitate trade-offs and compromise for most women in choosing a mate.

We know that men still commit infidelity more than women, although women seem to be closing the gap in modern times.  The reasons for this run a gamut of psychological, sociological, cultural, and economic issues.  Switching mates appears to be one adaptive strategy in response to the changing rules of heterosexual partnership.

*Dibble, et al (2015, June 11).  Simmering on the back burner:  communication with and disclosure of relationship alternatives.   Communication Quarterly, 63(3), 329-344.

Please Note: Your comment may take up to 12 seconds to register and the confirmation message will appear above the “Submit a Comment” text. 

Let’s Teach Girls, Too

Let’s Teach Girls, Too

by | Apr 21, 2020 | Gender Politics

In their op-ed in the Dallas Morning News and the Austin American-Statesman, co-writers Dan McCormick, assistant professor of Social Work, and Kris Sloan, associate professor of Education at St. Edward University, encouraged parents to talk to their sons about gender-based assault and harassment.  Sloan and McCormick suggest boys be taught how cultural hierarchy favors masculine characteristics over feminine qualities.  In the milieu of the #MeToo movement, Sloan and McCormick suggested parents should have conversations with boys about the meaning of consent and relationships based on shared power.  They point out that boys are taught from an early age to climb a hierarchy that exists between males and females, with a rejection of traits such as compassion, empathy, nurture, and vulnerability.

Boys Mostly Compete in an All-Male Hierarchy

I agree with the basic message of McCormick and Sloan about what to teach boys and about what is happening in male socialization.  What is missing, however, is what to teach girls in this same conversation.   McCormick and Sloan asserted that boys are taught to climb a hierarchy that puts boys at the top, ahead of girls.  While this may be true, far more ubiquitous and powerful is the teaching that boys/men must be at the top of the all-male hierarchy. 

We know from evolutionary psychology that boys and men ultimately behave in a way that secures the most sexual access to women. We know from mate selection science that men with the highest status and most resources have the most success in the mating marketplace. Studies even show that men who possess the “dark triad” of traits—narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy—have more consensual sex partners than the average man.  These men may also display very inappropriate behavior with a lack of consent.

Teach Girls to (Really) Prefer Traits of Compassion and Vulnerability

So, part of this conversation must be to teach girls that not only should their boyfriends and husbands have qualities of compassion, empathy, nurture, and vulnerability, but that they should prefer those traits over hierarchical status, power, and resources.  And the ‘sexiness’ of shared power is another issue and area of study. Good luck teaching something contrary to eons of evolutionary mate selection adaptation.  If teaching this to girls was done in parallel to teaching boys, we would have a holistic and transformative beginning to a much-needed sexual harassment reckoning.

Please Note: Your comment may take up to 12 seconds to register and the confirmation message will appear above the “Submit a Comment” text. 

Why More Men Than Women Die of COVID-19

Why More Men Than Women Die of COVID-19

by | Apr 7, 2020 | Biological Difference, Men's Issues, Women's Issues

“There are profound sex differences in immune systems and this pandemic is revealing them.”
Marcia Stefanick, Stanford University School of Medicine.

More men than women have died of the COVID-19 virus. In China, Italy, South Korea, Germany, France, Iran, the U.S – everywhere around the world, the death rate of men to women is disproportionate. In New York City, men have died at nearly twice the rate.

Death rates from COVID-19 are more evidence of the biological differences between men and women. What are the components of these differences related to the pandemic?

Habits and Comorbidity

Questions about the sex discrepancy in death rates have focused (heretofore) mostly on male behavior: higher rates of tobacco assumption, reluctance to seek medical care, and even lower rates of handwashing.

Smoking is associated with negative progression and adverse outcomes of COVID-19. Smokers are more likely to have lung disease, which is a risk factor for severe infection. Also, smokers are more likely to touch their mouths and face.

But, Sabra Klein, Professor of Molecular Microbiology and Immunology at John Hopkins* suggests that smoking is not the leading factor. “There is a growing observation of increased mortality in men across very diverse countries and cultures. When I see that, it makes me think that there must be something universal that is contributing to this.” Klein’s prior research revealed that men have lower innate antiviral immune responses to a range of infections including hepatitis C and HIV. “Their immune system may not initiate an appropriate response when it initially sees the virus.”

Men also have other “comorbidities”: higher rates of pre-existing conditions such as heart disease, high blood pressure, and diabetes. These conditions increase the risk of death from the virus.

Kathryn Sandberg, Director of the Center for the Study of Sex Differences in Health, Aging and Disease at Georgetown University, says one explanation for the disparity in COVID-19 deaths may have to do with angiotensin-converting enzyme 2 (ACE2), a protein on the surface of the cells in the lungs and other organs. ACE2 is key in regulating blood pressure and it works differently and more favorably for women. COVID-19 binds to ACE2. A study of COVID-19 patients in China found hypertension as the most common risk factor.

Overall Differences in Male and Female Lifespan and Risk of Death

We did not need a pandemic to know men live (on average) 4 years less than women; male suicide rates are much higher; significantly more men die at work and in war. We know men aged 15-25 have a vastly greater risk of injury and death. Evolutionary psychology speaks volumes about the reasons for the risky behavior of men vs. women. (It is related to androgens and mating behavior.)

In the context of a pandemic, it makes sense to remember those markers of health and longevity, but also to look deeper for underlying biological causes.

When it Comes to Survival, Men are the Weaker Sex.

Men are the weaker sex independent of a pandemic; the innate biological advantage of women is apparent at every age and stage of human life. Baby girls are more likely to make it to their first birthday. Eighty percent of all centenarians today are women; ninety-five percent of those who reach the age of 110 are women.

Female survival advantage holds regardless of education, economic factors, and alcohol, drug, or tobacco consumption.

Sandberg underscores the bottom-line: “It doesn’t matter what the infectious agent is, women tend to be better at knocking it down because they have a more robust immune system.”

Genetic Disadvantage for Males and Female Immunity

Female genetic superiority starts at the chromosomal level. The cells of genetic females have two X chromosomes. Having the use of a spare X chromosome gives females an advantage against a virus.

There are more than 2,000 genes on the two X chromosomes that interact and cooperate within a women’s body. Each cell predominantly uses one X chromosome over the other. According to physician and scientist, Sharon Moaelm*, if one X chromosome has genes that better recognize an invading virus like COVID-19, the other X chromosome that can do a different task – like killing cells infected with COVID -19. This makes the fight against the virus more efficient for women. An extra X brings extra immune functioning.

Males have to get by with just one X chromosome. If a male’s genes are not capable of recognizing or killing cells infected with the coronavirus, his ability to fight the infection will be limited. Historically, coronaviruses such as SARS and MERS tended to affect men disproportionately, according to Luis Ostrosky-Zeichner, infectious disease specialist at McGovern Medical School at UTHealth in Texas.

Since women have a greater immune response to the virus, they are quicker to reduce its viral load – the quantity of the virus. Women may also be able to launch an earlier attack on infections in general, saving the body from needing to use all of its virus-fighting capacity later.

It should be noted that women pay a cost for having a more aggressive immune system. Women are more prone to autoimmune diseases. The immune system of genetic females is more likely to attack themselves, which occurs in conditions like rheumatoid arthritis, multiple sclerosis, autoimmune thyroiditis, Sjogren’s syndrome, and lupus.

Hormonal Disadvantage for Males and Advantage for Females

Higher levels of testosterone appear to suppress the immune system. Estrogens have been found to stimulate a more vigorous immune response.

From an evolutionary perspective, some research suggests women have a stronger immune system against viral infections than men because they spend part of their lives with a “foreign body” inside of them; their baby grants them a survival advantage. Ostrosky-Zeichner believes that advantage may be related to hormonal changes.

Going Forward with Tests and Vaccine

A better understanding of men’s and women’s immune system response to the virus could be critical in developing a good vaccine. There are well-documented differences in vaccine effectiveness among men and women, with women tending to be better protected after vaccination. Therefore, it may be especially important to ensure that sex is taken into account when designing and analyzing vaccine trials.

And, as we develop antibody testing, what are the differences in the antibodies produced in men vs. women? Should the test be gender-specific? Sex differences in the immune response to COVID-19 are likely to show up in antibody surveys currently underway across the world.

Conclusion

Knowing more about how the virus differently impacts men and women could help determine the most effective treatment for individual patients. Nearly 20 years ago, the Institute of Medicine of the National Academy of Sciences published a report that claimed: “Being male or female is an important variable that should be considered.”

Moalem claims there has been little tangible progress on this insight in the practice of medicine. “We must now apprehend the real biological strength that each genetic female possesses and how men differ in this regard. The future of medicine depends upon it.”

*Sabra Klein is also President of the Organization for the Study of Sex Differences (OSSD).

**Sharon Moalem is a scientist, physician, and author. His most recent book is The Better Half: On the Genetic Superiority of Women. Moalem is an expert in the fields of rare diseases, sex differentiation, neurogenetics, and biotechnology.

Please Note: Your comment may take up to 12 seconds to register and the confirmation message will appear above the “Submit a Comment” text. 

Can We Be Honest About Women?

Can We Be Honest About Women?

by | Mar 24, 2020 | Gender Politics, Men's Issues, Women's Issues

In 2017, David French of the National Review wrote an article stating that men enter high-status professions and achieve wealth in part, or even primarily, to gain access to beautiful women. D.C. McAllister responded to French with her own analysis, “Can We Be Honest About Women?” in The Federalist (Dec.12, 2017).  She countered French by saying many men enter high-status professions in order to best other men in their field of expertise, not just to get beautiful women.  McAllister said competition can fuel men even more than sex.  Here, McAllister misunderstands cause and effect, ends, and means.  She misunderstands the underlying reason for male status aspiration and male competition.  At the most primal level of evolutionary adaptation, male competition is only about sex.

Woman Collude For Their Own Benefit

Most importantly, McAllister’s piece in The Federalist took issue with the assumption that women are passive and innocent in this situation. She spelled out basic truths about women that created ire among her feminist detractors.  David French asked what is wrong with men.   Rather than posit that men are wrong, McAllister correctly asserted that women “naturally” collude with men for their own benefit. Further, McAllister courageously proffered “we can’t always assume women are hapless damsels in distress horrified by how they’re objectified.   Women love the sexual interplay they experience with men, and they relish men desiring their beauty.  Why?   Because it is part of their nature.”

Citing a Pews Research study entitled, “On Gender Differences, No Consensus on Nature vs. Nurture,” McAllister noted that Americans valued physical attractiveness in women more than other traits.  Nurturing and empathy were second.  The traits most valued in men were morality and professional success.   Men want women who are attractive and emotionally sensitive, and women want good men who are financially successful.  (Zsa Zsa Gabor famously asked: “I want a man who’s kind and understanding.  Is that too much to ask of a millionaire?”)

Men are Drawn to Beauty Like Moths to a Flame

This is human nature.  McAllister aptly opined, “men are drawn to beauty like moths to a flame, and women want to be the flame.”  Beauty is a source of power, a woman’s “erotic” or sexual power.

“When men are being their sexual selves, drawn to a woman’s beauty, they’re not exploiting women, they are responding to them.”   McAllister continued, “let men love a woman’s beauty and let a woman delight in a man’s competence and success.  This is part of the dance between the masculine and the feminine, and we would be miserable if we stopped it.”  McAllister quoted James Joyce in “Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man” and cited an earlier analog in the Bible’s, “Song of Solomon.”  Adoration of female beauty is archetypal and mythic.  Most heterosexual women want to be desired and acknowledged for their physical beauty.   Can we be honest about that?   This is McAllister’s central point.  The fact that women want to be (and should be) acknowledged for their character and skills is entirely beside the point to this biological truth.

Women are Attracted to Economic Power and Men Will Produce It

McAllister inadvertently identified insights from evolutionary psychology and mate selection science.  She revealed the perennial erotic-economic bargain: the provision of resources (providing and protecting) for sexual access given in return — granting access to female beauty with its inherent signaling of fertility.   Thus, women are inextricably attracted to “economic” power, and men will compete and even conspire to produce it.   That is a fundamental biological and evolutionary truth.  It has been a successful adaptation for thousands of years.

All Male Behavior is a Response to Female Choice

All male behavior is etiologically a response to female choice in mate selection. Erotic power is “first cause” and reigns supreme because it is the power that sustains and populates the human race.  Male status aspiration and power displays are a result of adaptive success in attracting women.  So-called “trophy wives,” or “a beautiful woman on a man’s arm,” are mostly for the sheer pleasure of being next to “the flame” of female radiance.   They are the reward, the raison d’etre.   Men want a beautiful woman on their arm in the spirit of Lord Byron (She Walks in Beauty) and James Joyce.  To the degree this is a status display, it is meant (mostly below awareness) to elicit the response of the next woman.  The goal is more sexual access.  Status is the means.   The current woman and the next woman demonstrate the result of male status.

Power acquisition is an evolutionary adaptation for sexual access to women, but this power can be abused.   David French wrote derisively about men, lamenting sexual harassment in media, politics, and entertainment.   McAllister, to her credit, admitted that this male power, while sometimes off the rails, is also desired by women.   And a women’s beauty is part of the ancient agreement.  As Mae West once said, “it is better to be looked over, than over-looked.”

Please Note: Your comment may take up to 12 seconds to register and the confirmation message will appear above the “Submit a Comment” text.